Yesterday we drove out to Yucca Valley where I met with an oncologist named Dr. Philip Dreisbach. The meeting didn't just go well. It was fabulous! A meeting of the minds. We got along well. He answered all my questions. He understood my concerns and alleviated many of my fears. Adjustments will have to be made because of my current medical condition and my past medical history but he's willing to work on those things with me.

I'm waiting for a return call from our local imaging facility so that I can have a PET scan done for him. I will not be returning to the oncologist I saw a couple of weeks ago, and I hope my insurance won't have a problem with that. I know that everyone says to get a second opinion. So I hope my choice to use that second opinion instead of the first is going to be okay.

It's a long drive to Yucca Valley. And, as a matter of fact, Dr. Phil's main office is all the way down in Rancho Mirage. That's okay with me. I need to work with someone I have confidence in and have a rapport with. Someone I can talk to easily and comfortably. This man seems to be that person. He spent a long time with us yesterday. I hadn't realized how stressed out I was about the former oncologist and how relieved I was to find Dr. Phil, didn't realize just how much until I broke down and wept on the way back to the van after my meeting with him. Tears of joy, tears of total relief. Yes, I hate doing all this medical crap. Tests and needles and appointments and all of that stuff that I really can't stand. But I have to do it, and with Bob's help and this Dr. Phil, maybe I can get through it okay.

This is BS!

Now she calls me and says wait, looks like the biopsy tissue isn't cancerous. But there might be cancer cells in the dermis so she's ordering all kinds of tests. Good grief. I've contacted my primary and have asked for a referral to someone else so I can get a second opinion. Honestly, this is why I've avoided doctors for so many years.

For two months, I've thought I had breast cancer. I don't know what to think now. It would be wonderful if they made a mistake but frack, this is bullshit.

Oncology

I'm so angry and frustrated with the oncologist that I can't see straight. Didn't want to answer questions, was abrupt and seemed uncaring. I won't be going to her again. I'll find someone else.

All I got out of it was that although all my labs and vitals are perfect, I have a very aggressive cancer and the tumor is large. She wants to start chemo and then "take it off." Mastectomy. No options, and she seemed in a hurry to leave.

Frack that. I don't need hand holding or pity but a little respect would have been nice. I'll be calling my primary tomorrow.

SOOO annoyed.